Friday, September 11, 2009

Really Bad Day

I've backdated this entry for myself and posterity.

Where to start?


I decided to take a few steps back from my proposed "treatment plan" because, frankly, a lot of it didn't make sense. Studies show this, that, and the other thing. Mostly inconclusive as to benefit and pretty conclusively bad as to side effects.

Then I met (for nearly an hour) with the medical oncologist to whom I was referred. He spoke about studies and studies and more studies, and bottom line, They Just Don't Know about the long term effects for a Woman My Age (60). Most of the studies showing that the benefit is minimal are on women over 70 (and in some cases, over 75).

So this past week, I had 2 long appointments to be photographed, tattooed, CT scanned, photographed some more, line up on a narrow, stiff board, tattooed again, marked repeatedly with a permanent marker. My shoulder is painfully stiff from lying still, arm extended over my head at length.

Monday, I start radiation (33 sessions). I have been assured that the worst is behind me, but somehow, I doubt it.

My life is on hold until the end of October.


The percentages they quoted my mother (73) for recurrence without radiation (30-40%) and with radiation (5%) had her deciding to go forward. She was to start this week - same deal as you, 33 sessions. But the radiation oncologist raised concerns about the 'clear margins' around the lumpectomy site. They weren't quite clear enough, so she has surgery on Friday and, after she recovers from that, radiation.
Oh, and I meant to add, I'll be praying for you.
Sending you hugs and good wishes. You're in my thoughts girl. :)
You'll be in my prayers until you are healthy again!!
I don't know anything about percentages, but I also went through 32 or 33 (trying to forget) radiation treatments. I know exactly what you're going through and couldn't agree more with how you feel about it. But the days will pass and it will be over. It won't feel like "soon it will be over" but the days do pass. Hang in there. If they have any creams to offer you for your skin (believe me, it will get a bit burned and brown) do use them. I kept the cream I got at the pharmacy in the refrigerator and it felt marvelous to put it on after my shower upon returning home.
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